Family Photos and A Gender Reveal

2 Sundays ago we had family photos done. I had hoped to get them done in the summer. Since I really, wanted to get photos of the 3 of us, while Bennett was closer to 1 than 1 in a half. Such as life if though we were busy and then I was dealing with 1st trimester woes. However, I was determined to get family photos done, and I wanted to get them done before I began showing. Then of course we decided since we already knew the Gender of Baby #2 we would also take some Gender Reveal Photos.

22448679_10154841100185248_1852349574863475935_nWe woke up Sunday Morning and a lazy Sunday. Bennett woke up in an odd mood though, he wanted to lay on the couch and cuddle with us. He is not a cuddler. In fact, the longest he cuddles is about 10 seconds, before he pushes you away, kicks you or just plan gets up and leaves.  He went down for a nap and woke up the same way. However, he was still happy.  I thought, well maybe this is a good omen. He will be nice and calm for photos. Boy, oh boy was I wrong.

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Having an independent toddler, I have learned to give up on the perfect posed photo. (I don’t know how other Instagram/pinterest mommas get it done) However, that doesn’t mean I don’t dream of it. However, once we arrived at the Carmelite Monastery and met up with our photographer. Bennett was ready to explore and explore he did. He did not want to cuddle us, he did not want to pose, he did not want to stand still or be held. He wanted to run around, he even fell into a rose bush at the end.

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BUT I am beyond happy for the photos we did get. And that is that matters =)

Now onto the Gender Reveal. If you follow me on Instagram (@whatupKT) than you already know that what we are having, but for those who don’t…

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We are having another BOY!

“Fun” fact, pretty much right after this photo, I got super nauseous and ended up throwing up! Luckily, there was a tiny bathroom just off to the side.

“We take photos to return to a moment, otherwise gone”

 

Photography by: WanderKayStudio

Location: Carmelite Monastery in Santa Clara,CA

 

Bennett’s Birth Story

Since Bennett’s just turned a year and a half I thought I would share Bennett’s Birth Story. We did VLOG the birth on our youtube channel (here) but there is a lot that got left out.

Let’s Begin, Warning it is LONG, but also CRAZY.

My pregnancy with Bennett had been an actually easy one, until my 3rd trimester. Even then it had been easy, there we just some complications. At 28 weeks I was hospitalized for 4 days, because of a kidney infection. Around 35 Weeks I ended up getting a gnarly sinus infection and at 36 weeks I had an ultrasound that showed my placenta was deteriorating earlier than anticipated. So for the next 3 weeks, I was spending about 2 hours every week at the doctors office, taking non-stress tests, peeing in a cup to make sure my kidney infection didn’t re-occur and getting an ultrasound to make sure my amniotic fluids were okay and then checking to see how far dilated I was.

From 38 Weeks I was dilated at a 2, almost a 3 and my doctor was pretty convinced that I was going to go into to labor soon. Which half of me was excited for, but also not. For dumb reasons. Bennett’s due date was April 3rd. The last weeks of March are filled with family members birthdays, Easter landed exactly on the day I was 39 weeks and then April Fools Day happens right before then. Which is also my cousin’s birthday. So I was pretty determined to not have his birthday fall on any of those days, but also I wanted him OUT.  As I am sure many 3rd trimester moms can sympathize with.  Towards the end of 38 weeks my membranes were stripped and NOTHING happened.

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So, on April 1st, 2016 at 39 weeks and 5 days. I went on a walk around our neighborhood, like I had been doing pretty often throughout my pregnancy, but very often the last week to get labor started. Nothing happened. That night Andrew and I went out to a late dinner, fully aware this would probably be out last dinner as just the two of us and pretty stoked that even if I went into labor at this point; I would most likely not deliver on April Fools Day. We walked over to Alexander’s Patisserie and grabbed some Macaron’s and on our walk back to the car I started to have some contractions. They were a little strong but I wasn’t immediately expecting that this was labor, since I got Braxton Hicks contractions A LOT especially when walking. Never the less, I began tracking them and we went home.

Once we got home, Andrew was hovering over me, waiting for the signal that it was go time. The contractions were pretty consistent, so I told him I thought this was the real thing but we didn’t need to leave yet they were only 8-9 minutes apart and that he should go to sleep and I will wake him if it progresses. He eventually went to sleep and although, I tried… I was more concerned about making sure we had everything packed. So I spent my time cleaning Bennett’s nursery and packing. until around 1:30AM when they were about 5-6 minutes apart. I called my Mom to let her know, since she would be driving from Idaho, texted my Doctor to let him know (cause even though it is his job, I didn’t want to wake him so early in the morning) I woke Andrew and we headed to the hospital.

Once we arrived we were led to an L&D room, where a nurse checked my vitals, hooked me up to the machines that monitor the baby’s heart rate and my contractions and then checked me for dilation. What took place next had to have been the most awkward exchange I have ever had; the nurse a tiny older asian lady went to check and had the absolute most difficult time. I swear it felt like she was elbow deep in me. She was holding tightly to the side of the hospital bed. STRUGGLING. The look on Andrew’s face was mortified at what he was witnessing. Final after about 15 minutes, she says well you are definitely beginning labor… but you are only 2cm Dilated. (which didn’t make sense since at my most recent doctors appointment a day before I was 3cm) however, 2cm was not enough for me to earn a permanent room and they sent me home.

I should mention we live about 15-20 minutes from our hospital in a city about 3-4 towns away. Since we live in the Silicon Valley one of my biggest concerns was that I would go into labor during Morning or Evening traffic. Which can easily that 15-20 minute drive into 2 hours. So, at around 3AM we are on the way back home and as we are driving we my contractions are getting stronger. I get a text from my doctor apologizing that I am being sent home and that if my contractions start getting super strong to just go back to the hospital.  So we get home and I decided that I need to take a bath. While I am in the bath I have Andrew head to Safeway to get me Chicken Broth. Because I knew I would need nutrients in me for labor and delivery but I was (and still am) absolutely paranoid about pooping during birth.

5AM rolls around, the contractions are getting painful and we decide to head back to the hospital and this time we are admitted! Even in the same room as before. Then from 5AM – 9PM the day was kind of boring. When we arrived, the asked me if I wanted morphine and I was like ” I didn’t realize that was an option during labor and I was like “HELL YEA!’ and pretty much they confirmed I was in labor but I still wasn’t progressing.  I slept A LOT, sometime during midday my Doctor came in and broke my water. I got an epidural. Which the anesthesiologist said went absolutely perfect. I was progressing but still not as quickly as they wanted. I was given Pitocin. My dad stopped by to visit, I slept some more, TWO women in the room next to me had already given birth to their babies and I was still waiting. Around 9pm ish is when I could feel the head and the urge to push.  This is also when my mom miraculously showed up from her drive down from Idaho (which is a 12 hour-ish drive)!

So we began pushing. It wasn’t horrible, the one downside was that my epidural was so perfect that I couldn’t even feel when my contractions were happening to push, so my nurse had to tell me when.  I pushed and I pushed and his head was RIGHT there, it was almost time for the doctor to come in and we would deliver Bennett! And then I all of a sudden felt a distinguished pain in my right hip. A pain I was familiar with and at the only time could equate it to. It was similar to the pain I had, had when I had a hernia. So in my mind thats what it could have been. BUT nevertheless I knew something wasn’t right. The pain hurt so much that I couldn’t even push and that is when I knew I wanted him out and I needed a C-Section. I looked at Andrew, I looked at the new nurse who had just switched and I told them “I want a c-section”.

The nurse was the most rude and condescending person. She essentially acted like I was over-reacting and that I couldn’t possibly understand my body that well. ( a little note, growing up I have had A LOT of medical issues, I am quite in tune with my body). I remember looking at Andrew mid panic attack, like “help me.” but he didn’t know what to do. Here was someone in a position of power, refusing to do what I asked. Luckily, my mom was in the room and my mom knows that when I say something is wrong, I’m not messing around. So she went full mama bear and demanded to get my doctor and that my c-section was going to happen.

My doctor comes in and he explains that Bennett’s head is literally RIGHT THERE, he really doesn’t want to do a c-section and would I be willing to try the vacuum, if it fails I get my c-section regardless. At first, I said No. But a very sweet nurse came in and asked if I would be willing to try if they numbed the area where I had pain. The way she asked calmed down and I had agreed to try the vacuum. Within minutes my rooms was filled with all sorts of doctors and nurses. My doctor attempted the vacuum to no avail. Bennett was NOT coming out. So, they quickly rushed me to the OR.

I should mention that for my size, I have a very high tolerance to regular anesthesia. Andrew, joined me in the OR and I am lying on this table loudly moaning as I can feel all the tugging, pretty painfully. I remember the table vigorously shaking and looking over and seeing an observing doctor just completely wide-eyed and shocked and thinking “that’s not normal”. After this, I cannot tell you from personal experience what happened. It’s second hand from Andrew.  Without warning the anesthesiologist had put me under. Since I was essentially screaming on the table, loudly moaning more so. Andrew thought I had died. So he is panicking that I had died and then Bennett is born and he wasn’t breathing so he is quickly whisked off to the NICU. Andrew followed Bennett and everything ended up being fine with him.

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At 12:39AM on his due April 3rd, 2016 Bennett was born. It wasn’t until somewhere around 2AM that I woke up from being knocked out and got to meet him. I was so terrified cause when I first woke, I looked over to an empty islet and Andrew no where near. My mom was nearby and let me know that everything was fine and Andrew came in shortly to show me a picture of Bennett on my phone. I told him ” I probably won’t remember this” lol I did. But I was quite drugged up. The nurses soon brought Bennett in. So that we could have some skin to skin as soon as possible. It was such an uncomfortable was the meet him, I was so drugged up and in laying down position that I couldn’t really see him.

Eventually, I was told that what happened what although, Bennett’s head was right there. He was trying to come out at an angle,shoulder first. When they went to take him out during the C-section, he wouldn’t come out because the Vacuum had created a suction in my birth canal and he was stuck. So another doctor had the push him back up my birth canal, while my doctor pulled him out. Right after my doctor apologized to Andrew but it wasn’t until later in the morning that I saw him and he profusely apologized. He said, had he known Bennett was in the wrong position, I would have had a C-Section immediately and essentially, Bennett was NEVER going to have come out no matter how many times I pushed.

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We ended up being in the hospital for about 5 days, so that I could recover and because Bennett has jaundice and eventually, got to take him. For being a traumatic birth, I am very happy that at the end of the day I had a healthy baby boy, who is currently 1 1/2 years old, sitting on the living room floor, playing with his race cars and watching Curious George as I type this.

Weekly Shoutout: Alittleboutalot

Before I get into this small post, today I was suppose to write a post on Bennett’s Birth Story and I was going to post this on Saturday’s and make this a Saturday Post, but instead of double posting tomorrow. I will post this today and Bennett’s Birth Story tomorrow.

With that being said.. lets talk about the weekly shoutout. Every Saturday I want to shoutout another, Youtuber, Blogger, Instagrammer, etc. whose content I have been enjoying and think you should go check out and give some loving to. Often in this line of work we are so focused on our own SEO that we don’t think about spreading the love to others. A LOT of these creators are bigger than me and don’t really need my word of mouth.. However, I may turn a few of you on to somebody you never knew existed before. The internet is a big place!

My first Weekly Spotlight goes to a Youtuber named Jeannie, who runs a channel called alittleaboutalot. I was recently introduced to her channel, by another favorite Youtuber of mine, BitsandClips.

Her most recent video had me saying “YES!”

So, head over to her channel, subscribe, follow her on instagram (@alittleaboutalot) and let her know A Little Bit Biscardi sent ya ❤

Bennett’s Half Birthday

Yesterday, Bennett turned 1 and a Half years old.

I don’t know why, but this seems quite significant to me. Maybe, because to me 18 months is when he is actually a toddler. It is when he is capable of understanding, learning and doing more.  Like most Pinterest, social media obsessed mothers.. I envisioned a very cutesy 1/2 birthday celebration. BUT of course, with our schedules being pretty busy as of recent and me being 17 weeks pregnant. That did not really happen. And that is OKAY. Here is what did happen though.

Around 8:30 I walked into Bennett’s room to find a happy , but naked little boy. He had managed to take his diaper off. Luckily, no poop in the bed.. just pee.

We continued our normal morning routine and then headed to the grocery store, so I could pick up ingredients for his cake and a crockpot pot roast I planned to make for dinner. He was an absolute angel at the grocery store. Waved and said “hi” to every person that passed us and recently he figured out that we put the items we are buying in the big part of the cart.. so, he liked it when I handed him the objects we were buying and he could toss them into the back.

Once we got home, it was nap time. Since, we plan on using Bennett’s crib for the new baby and they will be sleeping in the same room. We decided to (hopefully) save us the trouble of sleeping training a newborn and transitioning a toddler to a big bed at the same time and have Bennett start taking naps in the big bed at 18 months and start sleeping at night in it around January. Even though, the baby will be in our room for the first few months, we thought we should be proactive about that now.

So, on his Half Birthday we began Day 1 of napping in the big bed. When it’s time for nap, he actually already runs to the big bed and sits on it so, tucking him in and leaving him there wasn’t hard. What is hard of course is him staying in bed. I was aware this would happen, but was hoping he would tire himself out and eventually go down. So while he was in his room “napping”; I began dinner.

Once I finished getting everything in the pot, I realized I had forgot 2 key ingredients for the cake. The eggs and the butter. So, I sent a text to Andrew to pick those 2 items up on the way home.  Then I checked on Bennett, who was still not sleeping as I could clearly hear him happily playing in his room and to my surprise the room was destroyed. So I picked him up and put him in his crib, since he still needed to nap and he didn’t go down for quite awhile.  When he did wake up he was totally in distress, bawling his eyes out and only wanting to cuddle me.

I took him into the living room and we cuddled and watched youtube, until Daddy came home. Andrew came home, I scrambled to bake the cake. We ate dinner (it was okay). I sloppily decorated him a cake and we sang him happy birthday, fed him a slice and he went to bed.

Not at all what I had envisioned, but that is life and in the end it worked out. Sure, he ate cake at 8pm and went to bed at 8:30pm but it worked out.

PS. He Did Wear Clothes at some point during the day.

 

Lately, I Have Stopped Reading The News

On Saturday night, if you asked me what todays post was going to be it would have been about our trip to Apple Hill to go Apple Picking on Sunday.

Sunday I woke up, went to clean Bennett’s bottle out and got a wiff of bad milk and was sick for the morning. So, we postponed our trip to Apple Hill. I decided since Bennett’s 1/2 birthday is on Tuesday, I will write about his birth story. Then around 11:30pm as we had just turned off our lights to go to bed. I got a twitter notification letting me know there had been a mass shooting in Las Vegas.

So, when I woke up this morning it didn’t feel right to write out a blog post about my sons birth story. After I got the twitter notification, I searched through twitter and Facebook for all of the information I could get about what was happening. I watched truly heart sinking videos of people dropping to the ground and I cried. At the time the count was 2 dead, 26 injured. I knew already from the footage and the weapon used (clearly audible as an automatic weapon) that when i woke up in the morning those numbers would be higher. I checked to see if anyone I knew was there. (so far, they are all safe) and then Andrew and I discussed what we saw. He asked why people were saying to get down, instead of running. I explained if the shooter is ground level, in a mass shooting he will most likely be shooting level and across. So, people want to get down to be out of the line of fire. We discussed that I thought the shooter, had shot from a room above and then we went to sleep; and sure enough when we woke up the tragedy was even worse than when we got the news. So, I took in the new details and thought about what I wanted to say.

I was 8 when Columbine happened, 10 for 9/11, 16 for Virginia Tech., 22 for Aurora, 23 for Sandy Hook. To just name a few of the horrific mass shootings. From 8 years of age, this fear had become a new normal. From 8 years of age,  I had done countless school drills for in case of shooter on campus and had do actively participate in several lockdowns for potential real case scenarios. My mother was a police officer, so it was normal to go over a just in case plan anywhere we went. I was taught to know where my exits are and to be aware of the people surrounding me.

At 26, I had my Son and I found out I could no longer read the news. I wanted to stay up to date and informed and what was going on around me in the world; but everything was so tragic and it made me so unbelievably sad. I was now a mom to a beautiful baby boy and all I wanted to do was protect him from danger. I was sad knowing that this is world him and my future children were  going to grow up in. So, for my sanity I stopped actively reading the news and I found I was no longer living this nightmare of anxiety. I got the bits and pieces I needed to know, but I no longer actively sought out the bad. I made a conscience choice to only allow the good into my daily life. At least the good that i could control. Cause realistically I cannot control all the bad in the world, I am aware of that and I am aware that bad will always be in our world, but I can do my part to not be the bad and to teach my kids to be good people.

I know this post is not the most eloquent, but I just kind of wanted to write I guess what is on my mind at the moment. Which is a lot. This is only a small part of it. I am terribly saddened by the tragedy of today, i am saddened that there are people out there that think this terrible violence solves whatever they are trying to solve. I am sad that innocent people, trying to enjoy some country music were killed. I am just sad at the state of our world.